Archive for May, 2015



   Posted by: Mel   in Life, Mom's Life Story

Clora Mae Coates

Clora Mae Coates

Today is Mother’s Day 2015. Today is also my Mother’s 79th Birthday. We celebrated her birthday on March 3rd this year, because we knew there was a chance she would not be here on her birthday. I am thankful we had made plans to do that the day after she came home. The day before we would celebrate, I would be told she only had 3-5 days to live. Yesterday was two months since she passed. Many probably would say celebrating her birthday early was bitter sweet. I haven’t yet found the sweetness of it. Extremely grateful to those closest to our family, who could be there to help us celebrate our Mom. My Mom. My heart.

I had said when my Mom passed away that I didn’t have much to say, because anything that needed to be said, I had said to her. There was nothing left unsaid between her and I. She knew me inside and out and I her. There was nothing about my Mother I didn’t know. I had the honor and extreme joy of taking care of her during her last 16 years on this earth. I would not trade one second for the time I got to spend with my Mom. I wouldn’t change it and would have gladly did it for the rest of my life. God had other plans for both of us. Until my Mom took her last breath, I still believed God would heal her here. Nothing that anyone could say or do would have changed my mind. There is something to be said when it literally takes God to change your mind about something you feel so strongly about. Unwavering faith, it should be taught on more often. But no matter how much faith we have, sometimes God says no.

I am the youngest of 10 children to my parents. My oldest sister passed away in 2009, my brother and sister just older than I passed away at birth. So there is seven of us left, spread from California to Illinois. Today I thought I would post something for them to read and hopefully it will make them smile, maybe even laugh (I hope none of you are in public reading this).

To my Siblings:

Do you have any idea how much Mom loved you? She was extremely proud of each of you, your lives and what you had become. She prayed for you daily. Often times I would walk into the living room, she would be praying for you and your kids, grandkids, I have to admit, some of you she prayed for more often than others. I won’t mention any names (Mike). But she prayed. And she prayed deliberately for you and your soul. More than anything she wanted you all to serve Jesus. And live your eternity in Heaven.

About four days before Mom passed, she stopped talking. The day before she stopped, I came into the living room that morning. She was talking, eyes wide open. I thought she was mumbling. I touched her arm and asked her who she was talking to. No one was in the livingroom. She smiled, “Jesus. I was just thanking Him for all he has done for us. For all He has done for you kids. He’s so good to us.” Some of her last thoughts and words were about Jesus and her kids. That should tell us all something.

She was proud of each of you and all you had accomplished. She, better than anyone knew you were not perfect and had made mistakes along the way. But she knew the prayers she had prayed and knew Jesus had heard her. Therefore, you would be just fine as would your kids and grandkids.

I am not sure I can say anything to you on this day to ease the pain or discomfort this day has brought. Or the past few months for that matter. But if I could say anything that would give you some comfort I would hope it would be this. God knew who we would be long before the earth was formed. He knew the mistakes, the sin, the joy and the pain we would bring to a Mother from time to time. Though it is a cliche’, I believe it is true, He hand picked Mom just for us. He knew how long it would take her to get us all in line, how many times she would have to say no, yes or “you know better than that”. He knew the moments when we would need her most and He knew the times when we would be able to stand on our own two feet. But He knew we would only get there, with having the right Mom to lead us. That was our Mom.

No other Mom would have put up with all you people! Stealing watermelons, driving the Fiat through the fields, getting shot at, driving motorcycles off the side of the mountain, shooting at wild life with a shot gun! Mopping the floor with sponges on your feet and gallons of soap and water, not to mention all the times she waited by the door to flip the light on and off when it was time to come in. Only our Mom would have put up with all that, discipline you and then waited the appropriate amount of time before she would tell the story and laugh the whole way through it.

She loved being a Mom. But also loved being a Granny. And you guys did that for her. You made her a Granny, Great Granny and Great Great Granny many times over. And the way you raise your kids, also shows honor to her. She left a huge legacy, her family. But to her family she left the greatest legacy anyone could ever leave, she left us the Legacy of Jesus. What we do with that legacy is up to us. How we treat who mattered to her most (Jesus), is our choice. I pray your choice is clear on this day. As for me and my House, we will serve the Lord. Will you?

I will leave you with this. The last 11 days of Mom’s life, she began to tell those she loved, just how much she loved them, how much she appreciated them. Handshakes turned into lasting memories for those closest to us. And “I love you’s” seem to be said from deep within her heart. She wanted to leave no doubt to those who had chosen to be in her life, that she loved them and appreciated them. Some of our friends and family would have extremely special moments with her. Moments that I hope they remember for always. On this day, if I could have Mom back for just a few moments, I would once again tell her how much I loved her and how thankful I am that she is my Mom. As I am sure all of you would. But that isn’t possible, is it? So instead I present a challenge for you. I would like for you to take a page out of the last week of Mom’s life. Call or text (or however you choose to contact them) your family and close friends who mean the most to you, tell them just how much they mean to you. Do not wait for the moments Mom had, you may not get them. Tell them now and tell them from your heart. Leave no doubt as to how much you really love them. In the last days of Mom’s life, she let everything go that didn’t matter. And she chose to love and be loved by those who chose to accept it and give it. Why wait till your last days? Let it all go. And just love. It will change your life and the life of those you choose to love and be loved by.

Your Favorite Little Sister,


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